Nothing Comes From Nothing(痞客邦分站)

我知道，我再也回不去從前的那個我了。
雖然太陽依舊每天東昇西落，雖然水仍然由高處往低處流，天是藍的，草是綠的，地球也一樣圓得那樣無庸置疑，但我發現，我的世界已經全都變了樣。
那年我22歲，醫生宣被我癌症末期。
面對無可預測的疾病，我們無計可施；面對未知的命運，我惶恐、茫然。當同年齡的朋友高高興興的規劃人生，我卻不知道我該何去何從，我甚至沒有明天。
那天，我躺在醫院病床上，聽著我的ipod，Amy Millan慵懶中略帶沙啞的嗓音，配合乾淨的鋼琴聲，輕輕柔柔的從我的ipod傾洩而出。

Stars - Canlendar Girl

If I am lost for a day
如果有一天我迷路了

try to find me
請試著尋找我的踪跡

and if I don't come back then I won't look behind me
如果我已下定決心　我不會再駐足留連於身後的風景

and all of the thigs that I thought were so easy
曾經我不以為意　以為一切都再簡單不過

just go harder and harder each day
但日子卻是一天比一天難熬

december is darkest
十二月裡深沈的黑暗

in june there's the light  
六月裡盛夏的光茫

but this empty bedroom
但這空盪的房間裡

won't make anything right
一切不再有意義

while out on the landing
房外的平台上

a friend I forgot to send home
我忘了道別的朋友

who waits up for me
他卻守候著我

all through the night
默默地陪伴我漫漫長夜

calendar girl who's in love with the world
與這個世界相戀的月曆女孩

stay alive!
好好地活著呢

calendar girl who's in love with the world
熱愛著這個世界的月曆女孩

stay alive!
好好地活著呢

 

I dreamed I was dying as I so often do
夢中瀕臨死亡的景象一如往常

and when I awoke I was sure it was true
當我從夢中醒來卻流下逼真的眼淚

I ran to the window
我奔向窗邊

threw my head to the sky
仰頭眺望天際

and said whoever is up there
悄聲細問浩瀚穹蒼之外

please don't let me die
請祢別讓我就這麼死去

but I can't live forever
我明白我不會永遠活著

I can't always be
我並非永恆不滅

one day I'll be sand on a beach by the sea
終有一天我將變成一粒細沙  隨著浪潮擱淺沙灘上

the pages keep turning
生命之頁翻過即不再復返

I mark off each day with a cross
我將那些日復一日飛逝的時光劃上記號

and I'll laugh about all that we've lost
然後我會微笑著說：「噢原來我們都曾經失去過」

 

calendar girl who is lost to the world
遺失了與這個世界連結的月曆女孩

stay alive
好好地活下去吧

calendar girl who is lost to the world
對這個世界已亳無感覺的月曆女孩

stay alive!
好好地活下去吧

January, February, March, April, May
一月、二月、三月、四月、五月

I'm alive!
我還活著

June, July, August, September, October
六月、七月、八月、九月、十月

I'm alive!
我還活著

November, December and all through the winter
十一月、十二月直到整個冬季結束

I'm alive!
我還活著

I'm alive
我會好好地活著

是的，我還活著，我會好好地活著！